Worldwide Wedding Customs

21. October 2009 by Jen.

Most consultants know that one of the best ways to get brides talking about their wedding is to work in comments about the history surrounding many of the customs that are part of our American/European wedding traditions.

Rings

Nearly all consultants will make comments on the engagement ring the bride to be is wearing. Once you have found out who picked it out and the circumstances under which it was given, it is good to add some historical background. For example, primitive brides wore rings of rushes or hemp. These were plentiful but not too durable since they had to be replaced frequently. Early Romans wore rings of iron to symbolize the permanence of marriage. As more precious metals became available, rings were made from silver, gold and platinum. Luckily, today’s brides have a wide range of choices as do their grooms.

Most legends tell us that the Egyptians started the tradition of placing the ring on the 3rd finger of the left hand because they believed that the vein, which ran through that finger runs straight to the heart. But in Medieval Europe, grooms placed the ring on three of the bride’s fingers in turn to symbolize the Trinity – “the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.” Starting with the index finger, the ring ended up on and remained on the 3rd finger, and that has since become the customary ring finger for all English-speaking cultures. However, in many European countries, the wedding ring is worn on the right hand, and a Greek woman may wear her ring on her left hand while she is engaged but move it to her right hand after her marriage.

The world is a more compact place these days. We have the traditions from our English- speaking heritage but there are a wide variety of traditions from other cultures, which could add meaning and sparkle to your celebration – IF there is a logical link to yours and/or your fiancé’s ancestors. Here are some ideas:

Africa - some tribes still perform the ancient rite of tying the bride’s and groom’s wrists together with plaited grass. To reflect this heritage, hold hands as you walk back up the aisle as man and wife.

Bermuda - Even today, islanders top off their tiered wedding cakes with a tiny tree sapling. The newlyweds plant the tree at the reception. Plant the tree in a place where you can both watch it grow along with your marriage.

China – The color of love and joy in old China is red and it is a favorite choice for the bride’s dress, candles, gift boxes, and money envelopes. If red is not your accent color theme for the wedding, find ways to add touches of red to unexpected areas. It is not just a vivid color – it is for luck.

England –The village bride and her wedding party always used to walk together to the church. A small girl would lead the procession, strewing floral blossoms along the road so that the bride’s path through life would always be happy and flower-laden. If your reception is close by, walk to it from the church and if there are children attending or part of the new family, let them lead the way.

Finland - Finnish brides once wore golden crowns. After the wedding, the unmarried women danced around the blindfolded bride. It was thought that whomever she crowned would marry next. Adapt your headpiece and if the gown permits, choose a garland of flowers for your headpiece at your reception. If you choose the next bride the same way, you can save your gown bouquet.

India – Before the end of the ceremony, the groom’s brother sprinkles flower petals on the couple to ward off evil. After your ceremony is over have a special family member or friend hand a single flower to every guest.

Ireland – Be true to your ancestral customs and have a traditional Irish wedding cake. Not the white cake we know today as wedding cake, but a heavy, rich fruitcake laden with raisins, almonds, cherries and spices. Some couples select this for the groom’s cake today and serve both kinds of cakes to their guests. If you wish, the cake can be laced with brandy or served with liquor flavored toppings.

Italy – For centuries, guests at Italian weddings tossed confetti at the bridal couple. However, it was not the pieces of colored paper that we think of today. It was sugared almonds. Today’s version of that custom has become the couple’s gift to their guests. Popular favors are small, decorated boxes or bags filled with sugarcoated almonds that guests take home with them.

Japan –The bride and groom take nine ceremonial sips of sake during the wedding ceremony. They are considered married after the first sip. There are no vows, as we know them. Sips of sake are exchanged with the parents, both to honor them and to mark their formal acceptance of the marriage. A western version of this ceremony would be for the couple to drink from the wine cup and then ask both sets of parents to sip from the cup to show the close ties between the two families.

Poland – It has long been tradition at Polish weddings for guests to pin money on the bride’s gown to buy a dance with her. (Hence the term “pin money”). Brides wishing to continue this custom either have their maid of honor or bridesmaids collect the money, or use a special white satin purse for the collection. No bride wants to ruin her lovely gown with pinholes or small tears from carelessly applied pins.

Russia – Guests at Russian weddings not only bring gifts, but they get them as well. The concept of favors goes beyond candy. Guests may receive small picture frames with photos of the couple, bud vases in which they are encouraged to take home small groups of wedding flowers or instant photos of themselves

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